Not a political diary, not an inspiring or even happy diary- this is a diary about an iota of evil.
A singularity of wrong, impenetrable and unfathomable- existential to the point that it is not a thing that can be grasped, and so can not be destroyed.
These bits of evil float around us and it is perhaps for the best that the human reaction is to fail to see them. However, sometimes we are presented with such evil- and that is perhaps the greatest crisis of the human spiritual condition:
What can you do with a wrong so vibrant that it demands redress- but which can not be destroyed; evil that tranforms and takes up new residence in its attacker.
I do some pro bono work as a child advocate, representing the interests of children who are victims or witnesses of crime. My local courts, child welfare agencies and DA’s Office (however much I might malign them) do a great job with such kids, so mostly what I get out of my volunteer work is an opportunity to read the newspaper and feel good about myself.
But not always. Today was different, I met evil. I was at a preliminary hearing to represent the interests of an 8-year-old rape victim. Over the course of a year, a six foot six, three hundred-pound man had repeatedly raped her. She had been assaulted to the point that her internal organs had been damaged to the point of being medical novelties.
The DA was no whiz, but the defense attorney was either more incompetent, or risking his livelihood as an attorney. The young woman, however, was breathtaking. One of the best witnesses I have seen. She was collected and well spoken, unafraid of confronting her attacker (who was leering and smirking throughout.)
The rapist was held over for trial on enough counts to keep him in jail until he dies. I never had to open my mouth.
Then we had a dependency status hearing for the young woman. She is currently placed with a wonderful foster family, her new mom stays home with three foster kids and her new dad is one of the best cops in the city. She is thriving emotionally and intellectually.
But she is not thriving physically. The damage to lungs and digestive tract is healed. Her liver and kidneys are stabilized, but she will never regain full function in those organs. But her uro-genital tract is a problem. Sudden, serious blood loss and mysterious discharges of fluid require constant emergency room care.
Her psychiatrist testified about the pressing need to be seen and treated by some of the extraordinary pediatric gynecologists that we are fortunate enough to have in our city. Being stabilized at emergency rooms wasn’t doing her any long-term good.
Why is a psychiatrist testifying about a gynecological issue? Because he is the young woman’s only doctor. The court has the power to commit her to outpatient psychological care, and had used this power to put her in the care of a psychiatrist who keeps up his basic skills as an internist.
The court had to do this because of the young woman’s mother, the girlfriend of the rapist and mother of his three children- the younger siblings of his victim. When the little girl was being raped, her attacker told her that telling her mother would do no good. He told her that her mother would do nothing to him, but would kill her.
The girl’s mother has contacted, through her attorney, nearly every competent provider of the medical services this girl needs and threatened them with legal action if they treat the girl without her consent. This is, and will be the mother’s right for at least the five to six more months it will take to fully terminate her parental rights.
The mother is doing this because she is taking revenge on the girl for “stealing her man.” (These are, infuriatingly, quotes of attribution, not disbelief.)
The mother is subject to no legal jeopardy. In fact, permanently removing the girl from her custody will happen swiftly, but not without a number of Judges and lawyers coming close to violating their cannons of ethics.
For now, in order to get the girl the treatment she needs, the child welfare agency must get a court order for each and every doctor’s visit. This is happening and the remarkable young lady is going to have the opportunity to grow into her remarkable human potential. I never had to open my mouth.
But that mother. The woman who is trying to kill her daughter because she believes that the little girl seduced a grown man, her man- into pulverizing the little girl’s organs. I should have killed her right there in the courtroom. The bailiff’s, the criers, the judge and the lawyers and the court reporter- all of them should have killed that woman when they had the chance.
Not one of us in that courtroom can take any moral satisfaction for not killing her. It was no obeisance to the law to stay our hands. It was indifference, or cowardice- more charitably- it was paralysis in the face of true and singular evil.
What can be done? I can only turn to my own belief that the universe has some inscrutable good purpose-
that and a feeling that evil took up residence in the place that the mother’s soul used to be before it was destroyed by desiring the things she saw on TV.
(Some details have been altered to preserve the privacy of individuals who deserve it.)
