We’ve all had an overdose of orgasmic patriotism since 2001. And we know that most of the orgasms are fake. Good patriotism, like good sex, takes work. Fake patriotism is those yellow magnetic ribbons and those flags on both sides of a car, flapping at high speeds like Pollyanna’s pigtails.

Then there’s patriotism exploited to sell cybersex:
Via Dan Gillmor‘s piece today, “A PR Pitch for the Ages,” which links to Dwight Silverman’s Techblog:

Patriotism is the last refuge of a bad PR pitch

Both those who draft press releases and those who receive them know that luring reporters to write about something is an art.

Sometimes, it’s a very black art.

Take, for example, the pitch I received this morning via e-mail. This is either incredibly brilliant, or astoundingly cynical. It’s for a service that lets couples control each other’s sex toys over the Internet.

Now, cybersex is not new. I’m not sure connecting sex toys to a computer is new — this is not something I, um, track in my day to day coverage. But it’s not something that most mainstream tech journalists would go anywhere near, except maybe on a really slow news day or when they want to poke fun.

So how do you sell something like that to a journalist? Why, using patriotism, of course!

How do military and professional couples, often separated for months at a time, keep their marriage and relationship healthy?

With the development of new Internet technologies, some choose “virtual interaction” to stay in touch while apart.

Christale and Greg, a proud American military couple, are a typical example. The entrepreneur and Air Force Sergeant were sometimes separated for months at a time and decided to join [redacted] to be able to interact while Greg is on assignment.

Wait, it gets better.

[Redacted] is an online community where members can keep in touch and engage in online interaction. When used with Doc Johnson’s most popular adult toys that are controlled over the Internet, the private one-on-one sessions allow for a “see, hear and touch” interaction never before possible.

“It really is incredible to be able to see Greg, hear him and be physical with him while he is on assignment. It really gets tough when he’s away and during our ‘virtual sessions,’ I feel like we’re really together!” Christale said.

As Silverman concludes, “This may be a valid company, and there may be some couples who do use it to stay, um, “in touch,” but using the military as a story peg for something like this is way out of bounds.”

P.S. Silverman won’t name the company.

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