A temporary loss of possession of the remote control resulted in me being subjected to Brook Shields’ speech at the Michael Jackson memorial. I can safely say that a tape of that can be used to coerce false confessions in minutes without the use of water torture. In fact, I can think of nothing more nauseatingly painful to my brain than what I just witnessed. Even Sarah Palin pales in comparison. Mental anguish doesn’t even begin to describe it. I would have done or said anything to make it stop.

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