Update [2011-2-9 13:34:15 by Damnit Janet]: I tried to fix some errors before running off to work. Now I can’t seem to submit it.
My apologies, this isn’t really a “diary” but a Hello.
Dear Oui & WW and Froggie Friends,
I’m alive and well. I’m much safer and more focused nowadays. Still beating the street and conversing with the politicians and movers-shakers. Chased off Condi and got “this close” to Karl Rove (by accident) and got to stand up and called him what he is a “effing War Criminal”. I’ve lost a few cameras due to being “maced” which isn’t mace at all – it’s a combination of nasties.
It’s odd, we were hassled and arrested for wearing t-shirts near “free speech zones” yet the GOP (and that’s what the teabaggers are) get away with hauling guns and rifles to health care rallies, many of which were on school grounds and they get massive media coverage. I guess 10 Bubbas with guns at a school wanting to deny kids medicine is impressive compared to 30,000 in the street, peacefully demanding an end to illegal occupations. But you get what you pay for, and many have been paid off and bought.
I know that this country would riot in the street… if you took Monday Night Football off the air, yet no one really blinks an eye when attrocity after heinous attrocity occurs. I no longer know what it will take to wake this country, this society up – but it’s not about them…
I have one mantra in life: “What did you do once you knew?” It helps me look my kids in the eye. It keeps me from being complicit in my own enslavement. It keeps me attempting to live a life of integrity, dignity, responsibility. I could become an ExPat (still an option) but no matter where I run, there I’d be still having to walk my talk with my children.
It’s not about politics. Not anymore. I don’t think it every really was political for me. Yeah, I’m a bleeding heart liberal. I see many Liberal Hunting bumperstickers, I hear that “Liberalism” is a disease whose only cure is a bullet throught the head. Politics is ugly, barbaric and downright brutal, bastardly business. Always has been I think.
This is about humanity for me. Not Tweets, not recs, not tips. I’m an activist, not an author.
What I did here and at the Big Orange was I tried to put a human face on the newbie activist. The Mom who flew away so she could come back a better person and hopefully in a wee bit better world. I tried to share my fear, my worries, my achievements and my defeats.
Marching and protesting and infiltrating and GOTVing and coming face to face with pure evil like Rove are the easy things. They’re nothing! What’s hard is living your life and making the daily choices. Cheap has a price, being a locovore and supporting sustainability is hard work, knowledge is power and empowering your self and kids with love and volunteerism is hard. I know many “progressives” who still purchase Bud Beer and support bastard stores like Wal-Mart. I can’t. What does shopping and cooking got to do with war? It’s all connected. It’s all about humanity.
I came to share with others. I came to get strength. What I didn’t realize all along was that I was already strong. But I have grown up in these past few years. I have made changes in my life and hopefully a few others.
I’ve batttled with intense anger and hopelessness issues. I’ve had to make a will to soothe my husbands worry about whether or not I’ll return home safe after just attending a freaking Peace Rally or what some redneck might do to me as I walk to my car after work. The other day my car was vandalized.
I’ve learned many truths that have made me question whether any society is actually a safe and sane one. I’ve seen many things that should make me stop. I’ve been threatened just because of my words on a screen. I gather that Glen Beck or Fox has recently put out an American Taliban style fatwah against CodePink. But all women who stand up for anything are not really chreished or protected in this country anymore.
I’m still with CodePink. But that is not who I am. It’s a part of me. I am just a human.
Due to numerous ear infections (I’m now dairy free) I have serious ear injuries which causes nasty episodes of vertigo. My job allows me FEMLA and they treat it as if it were like seizures. Vertigo lasts for me about 8 to 10 hours on average where I’m completely incapcitated. This, too, has brought me to a new learning curve in my journies. I hate loss of control. I hate feeling so vulnerable. But I have to make some peace with it… Vertigo is a real bitch. But I’m in a place where I’m safe, supported and still can live sanely with it.
My son has graduated with a modified diploma and is in a wonderful program for adults with developmental disabilities. He raises money for the Oregon Food Bank. This year he got his Oregon ID -bittersweet as he didn’t get a driver’s license. He was refused an ID because of a new law that states a military issued birth certificate is no longer valid. The DMV stated that if didn’t obtain a “real” BC that they’d have to notify social security, homeland security, the school district… blah blah. He was born in Washington State at a NAS. I wonder if McCain had the same problems?? I didn’t just wonder though. I wrote letters and made phonecalls and empowered my son to act. He got his ID eventually and this year he voted for the first time. On his own.
My daughter is still quite the humanitarian hellion. She really puts her teachers through the paces. Personally, last year was a horrendous one for me as I lost my mother due to morbid obesity and colon cancer and pancreatic cancer.
I watched my mother die while I was being Palined and Becked to death by her family. Hospice were wonderful and some of my mom’s relatives have actually left their church of hate due to all that took place at her deathbed and funeral. I couldn’t fight or flee… there was another option. A hard one. I just had to keep my head up. One of the harder things I’ve ever done. Hold my mother’s hand as she slipped away. We also lost our dearest friend and almost every pet we had died of old age. So… we have a new cat named Dylan who was 5 yrs old and never had a home. Life continues.
But through these times and this blog I made many wonderful friends. Some I’ve met and many I intend to in the future.
I continue to make friends and make peace with myself. I know I can’t stop the illegal occupations but I can stop the wars within myself. I can’t stop the oppression of children and women but I can continue to progress as a citizen, as a woman, as a human being. As they take my rights away, I can still make choices.
This year I’m working on a little patch of my yard and making a herb garden and try to make a small garden of edibles. An Urban Homesteader who hasn’t a clue about any of it but I’ve gained several books about it and what the hell… there’s something about gardening and learning to can jam that’s somehow very basic and almost magical. Sometimes that’s what I need, the basic and the magical. I need a balance from the RoboCops and the pulling my hair out. The jam may not turn out but I’ve heard that jam mistakes make great margaritas.
I hope all continue to be safe and sound… but continue to be alert and aware… and active in their own way.
I have to run to work now, sorry for the typos, errors and butchering of grammar and if this is bad form or meta or I’ve broken some rule.
I had asked AndiF about a few people a while back. I was curious how Oui, OMIRtheStoryteller and my mind is blank now… 🙂 were doing. NancyP today alerted me of Oui’s post and …. again, I had to share.
Peace & Strength.
So great to hear from you, DJ! Thank you for taking the time. Glad to know you keep on keepin’ on, as we all must do. There’s a serene strength in your words that make them nourishing to read — even deeper than it was before. I’m very happy to hear news of your children & that they continue to be engaged, conscious & sane; youth is hard & so many societal forces exert negative pressure. Please accept my condolences on your mother’s passing. If the community surrounding her was changed positively in any way at that time, she left… Read more »
As I told Andi, I sometimes come back to reread my words. Not sure why, sometimes to remember, sometimes when I’m trying to forget. It was a really bad year for us personally. It was a yaer of death and loss. But it was also a year of finding out how my little family really pulls together. Also, CodePink kept me safe when I possibly wasn’t making the best judgement calls. (I was supposed to infilitrate a Rove “thang” and my dear friend died two weeks before – a Pinker picked me up for the action and they had… Read more »
. Those were the days – “You don’t support the troops!” by Damnit Janet (48 recoms) BooMan Cali Scribe chocolate ink Man Eegee shirlstars rolfyboy6 ask SanDiegoDem mrsdbrown1 SallyCat alohaleezy catnip Anomalous JLongs d52boy Oui Steven D Knoxville Progressive Planet B Militarytracy Our Man in Redmond RubDMC sbj Aquarius40 Cho Alice ubikkibu sngmama Second Nature olivia shermanesqe raincat100 Egarwaen ejmw BostonJoe supersoling JanetT in MD Gaianne NorthDakotaDemocrat beagleandtabby neoconnedagain macdust just another vet keepinon Salunga momagainstthedraft NeilDB jimstaro …48 total. Yep DJ, your excellent coverage of anti-war protests and Cindy Sheehan was truly a joy te read. Hugs (((DJ))) and… Read more »
Thank you for remembering me. I’m so glad you’re still around and sharing your fantastic words.
xoxo
Hi Janet, shirl and I were just talking and wondering about you the other day, so I am especially glad to see your name here today. I am kind of surprised I didn’t have a rec. on the post Oui made, I must have missed that one. I haven’t been very active on any blog recently but I still read a lot and keep aware of everything, even though it is not good for my health. Like a lot of people I have faced heath issues in the last year, but I am still doing as well as can… Read more »
Sorry to hear of your health issues. When it comes to health and politics, I’ve found that it’s good to stick with what you know and keep it simple. We’d all kill ourselves and be total stressmonkeys if we tried to fix all the worlds ills. My husband believes very strongly that the only “war” we can win and should wage is the war on hunger. So that’s what he does. He does Meals on 2 Wheels 8 times a month. I’ve had to really focus on not what I think can be the biggest impact of stoppping the… Read more »
Hi Janet…damn it’s good to hear from you. As Diane mentioned I too think of you quite often. You say you’re not an author but your diaries were always heartfelt, passionate yet always made your point with a clarity I greatly admired with your ‘humaness'(is that a word?)shining through as does this diary.
Wonderful to hear about your kids, I’ve wondered about them also and what was happening with them. Love to you and your family.
I think of you as well. Thank you for your wonderful words. You don’t know how many of your posts/replies to me gave me a boost of courage at times I doubted. I’ve been having “Marmotinis” with Andi and JimF off and on these past years. I try really hard not to trash out her little blog with all my insanity and angst. In fact, she’s even been dear and called me during some hard times when I’ve asked for help. Maneegee even has been IN my house. Well, just once but he can come by any damn time… Read more »
Gunpowder margarita-ah that sounds like a way to start off a party-I’m ready!
Good to see you, DJ. Sorry to read of the difficult year past. Keep up the good fight!
Hey there! I really miss reading your stuff. OMG I thought of you when I saw the DVD of Ewan McGregor’s “Long Way Down” where he and a friend take their motorcycles down through Africa and they meet up with some school and kids and they talk about the landmines and the education of landmines there. Thought of you because if I remember correctly, you have done landmine removal… My spouse may be taking a sabbatical to that area as part of a fight hunger trip. I might join him. Not sure. Anyways, thank you for saying Hello.… Read more »
Haven’t seen that movie, but your recollection is correct. I was involved in mine action for a while a few years ago.
Here two colleagues in a previous battle area just outside Juba, South Sudan – in 2006. Plenty of UXO lying around and a few mines as well:
No longer doing that, though. Now in Geneva, halfway through a 2-year assignment with another UN agency.
Cheers to you and your husband – activist couple you are!
You lead an amazing life, Ask. I’m just in awe. My daughter seems to be heading in your direction. However she still is unsure of exactly what she wants to do. She’s been talking about being a zoologist and helping people in other countries learn how to care for their ranch animals better or help with sick/diseased animals. But she’s also a major humanitarian streak in her. She just got an accomadation from UNICEF she’s been doing things with them since she was 5 or 6. Peace Corps has come up. She’s doing college forcasting this week at… Read more »
Your daughter is making some great career considerations – good luck to her in finding the right college.
Internships in the UN (I’ve had a couple of them working with me) are by regulation limited to grad students.
Remember the picture of my daughter in the diary I wrote on the NY peace march in April 2006? That little girl is now a pol-sci/French majors junior. This year doing an exchange program in Paris. Looks like we have just found her an internship for the summer at an internationally well recognized NGO in Tanzania. Very exiting for her.
Janet, So good to see you here! I’m glad that you are still active but sorry that you had a difficult time recently. Your energy still never ceases to amaze.
Good to see you, too. I wasn’t as active these past 6 months as I would have liked but… things’ll be different this year. Glad you’re still painting and giving the planet more art.
You may not know it but you are in my thoughts often.
I just wanted you to know that for myself, in my life, you and a couple handsfull of others who gathered here in those days, had a profound impact on me. Without doubt my life has been enriched for having had you enter it.
with love
Hi Super..I could say the same about you. I still have the picture for the holiday’s of the red lights christmas wreath peace sign you put up here at one time. Your words like Janet’s always had an impact on me.
Hey Janet – just in case you read this. I remember you. I use a pseudonym these days (the joys of dealing with a stalker a couple years ago), but my guess is you’ll suss out who I am quickly enough. I’m slowly reviving Everybody Comes From Somewhere if you ever feel like visiting (check the links in my signature).
Keep on keepin’ on.