We get it. You can’t play a musical instrument, you’re not too good at sports, you have no artistic ability, the popular kids think you’re a dork, you don’t excel at academics, and no one seems to share your values. The only girls you can get are the ones looking for a sugar daddy. We get it, you hate cool.

You hate cool. You hate the kids in the band. You hate the jocks. You hate the artsy-fags. You hate anyone smarter than you. You hate people who read Shakespeare and talk about Proust. You hate your professors. You hate women who work for a living and have no use for your old-fashioned ideas about gender roles.

You like Rush Limbaugh. You hate cool.

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