Every so often you read a story that just makes you react strongly. You know . . . throw things at the TV, send the dog and cat for cover, use language that wilts the begonias, that sort of thing.
OK, that happens pretty much on a daily basis. This one, however, takes the cake. A petty security official has declared the First Amendment null and void in the security checkpoint area of Milwaukee where he has staked out his fief.
What was the offense? A bomb threat? A hijacking hoax? Declaring that one has illegal substances on or about their person?
Nope. The hapless traveler took the plastic bag the TSA issued him to put his toothpaste and hair gel into, and wrote “Kip Hawley is an idiot” across the front of it.
Kip Hawley, you see, is the secretary of the Transportation Security Agency and, ultimately, this Barney Fife wannabee’s boss.
Here is a substantial portion of the story as posted on the Flyertalk.com user forums:
Yesterday, while discussing the new rules a fellow Flyertalker suggested we write “Kip Hawley is an Idiot” on the outside of our clear plastic quart bags. So I did just that.
At the MKE “E” checkpoint I placed my laptop in one bin, and my shoes, cell phone and quart bag in a second bin. The TSA guy who was pushing bags and bins into the X-ray machine took a good hard look, and then as the bag when though the X-ray I think he told the X-ray operator to call for a bag check/explosive swab on my roller bag to slow me down. He went strait to the TSA Supervisor on duty and boy did he come marching over to the checkpoint with fire in his eyes!
He grabbed the baggie as it came out of the X-ray and asked if it was mine. After responding yes, he pointed at my comment and demanded to know “What is this supposed to mean?” “It could me a lot of things, it happens to be an opinion on mine.” “You can’t write things like this” he said, “You mean my First Amendment right to freedom of speech doesn’t apply here?” “Out there (pointing pass the id checkers) not while in here (pointing down) was his response.”
At this point I chuckled, just looking at him wondering if he just realized how foolish that comment was, but I think my laugh pushed him over the edge as he got really angry at this point. A Milwaukee County Sheriffs deputy was summoned – I would have left at this point, but he had my quart bag with my toothpaste and hair gel.
When the deputy got over the TSA supervisor showed him the bag and told him what had happened to that point. After he had finished I started to remind him he had left out his statement that my First Amendment rights didn’t apply “here” but was cut off by the deputy who demanding my ID. I asked if I was under arrest, and his response was “Right now you are not under arrest, you are being detained.” I produced my passport and he walked off with it and called in my name to see if I had any outstanding warrants, etc. The TSA supervisor picked up the phone about 20 feet away and called someone? At this point two more officers were near by and I struck up a conversation with the female officer who was making sure I kept put. I explained to her who Kip Hawley was, why I though he was an idiot, and my surprise that the TSA Supervisor felt my First Amendment rights didn’t’ apply at the TSA checkpoint. She didn’t say much.
After he was assured I didn’t have any warrants out the first office came back and I had my first chance to really speak, I explained that I was just expressing my opinion and my writing should be protected my by First Amendment rights. When he didn’t respond, I then repeated that the TSA Supervisor stated my First Amendment rights didn’t apply at the TSA check point and I asked if he (the deputy) agreed that was the case. He responded by saying “You can’t yell fire in a crowed theater, there are limits to your rights.
At this point I chucked again
I asked how this was even remotely like shouting “Fire” in a crowd, and his answer was “Perhaps your comments made them feel threatened.”
It’s no wonder people feel threatened, with at least one major television network devoted exclusively to making them feel afraid. Incidents like this aren’t new. Dissident John Gilmore, for instance, was kicked off a plane for wearing a 1″ button that said “Suspected Terrorist.” I’m sure you can figure out what his point was. Teachers getting kicked out of Presidential rallies for wearing T-shirts promoting peace. An Iraqi blogger being kicked off a plane for wearing a T-shirt that said, “I will not be silent,” in Arabic. (Somehow I doubt the perpetrators of this particular atrocity would have known if the T-shirt said “Coca-Cola” in Arabic, a shirt I’ve seen a number of times myself.)
I talked to my mother on the phone on Sunday. Every time one of us calls she asks if I’m ever going to come visit her in Montana. I would love to do so, of course; she’s getting up there in years and not in the best of health. But I wince every time I think about having to go through the nightmare of airport security. (And thanks to bean-counters at Amtrak, the train doesn’t even go through Billings anymore — a town that was named for the son of a Northern Pacific executive and where the old part of the city was laid out in a grid with the railroad as its base.)
My daughter and granddaughter would love to go to Disneyland. I’d love to take them. But apart from the money it costs for such an excursion, again, I’d have to go through the guantlet to get on the plane.
It’s just not worth it.
I can appreciate that people are nervous enough about flying these days, in spite of the fact that cheeseburgers will do you more harm than planes will. But this is just a symptom of what we as a country have become. In the short span of a generation or two we have gone from “We have nothing to fear but fear itself” to “We have nothing to embrace but fear itself.” Whatever happened to “Give me liberty or give me death?”
Maybe we should start writing that on the sides of those TSA bags.
